What Mary Richards Meant to Me

Recently Mary Tyler Moore was honored with a Lifetime Achievement Award from the Screen Actor's Guild. In my opinion, it was long overdue! Mary Tyler Moore is one of my "idols'. I actually really dislike that term and only use it sparingly. However, the characters she has played have had an influence on my life. Of course, I was too young when it originally aired, but I loved her as Laura Petry in the Dick Van Dyke show. I loved her clothes and the fact that she and Rob were equals in their household, which was rare for a show shot in the 60's. Of course, most of all I loved and adored Mary Richards.

Although I was only 5 when the Mary Tyler Moore show began—it is my all-time favorite show. My choice of favorite show has never wavered. However, I never realized the impact the show had on me until my wedding day. I’m sure I watched the show at 5 years old, but my memories of the show are from ages 8-12. I so wanted to grow up to be Mary Richards. I wanted the great job at a TV station, the fabulous clothers, the cool apartment with the big windows, the friend who lived upstairs, the dates she went on and I wanted my own “J” on my wall.

Mary Richards was an amazing role model for a young girl growing up in the 70’s. She was single, earning her own way and advancing in a profession she never intended to pursue. Of course, I always fantasized that I would throw a better party than Mary!
I remember sitting in the living room with my mom and dad watching the series finale. I cried during the group hug. It was a perfect ending. Later in life, I was grateful for Nick at Nite. I taped every episode during a MTM marathon. When I was stressed, anxious or feeling down—I plopped in a MTM tape into the VCR and all my cares drifted away. Watching an episode of that show is truly therapeutic for me. The comedy is timeless.


Flash forward to age 29 and it is my wedding day. The day was perfect, fun and filled with loved ones. My Maid of Honor hosted an after party post our reception. I suddenly started to feel panicked and stressed. I discreetly ducked into a bedroom to chill out. It finally hit me. I was sad because I realized I was NOT going to live Mary Richard’s life. Mary didn’t marry at 29. In fact, at 29 she was just moving to Minneapolis and twirling her hat into the air! She lived on her own in a great apartment. I was now married and knew learning about “mortgages” was in my near future. (Side note: I remember listening to all my married friends talk about mortgages when I was single and I swear it was like listening to the adults in a Charlie Brown episode! Ugh—I hated the word s points and escrow.)


Even though my wedding day was a happy one, I really felt like I was leaving a part of me behind, My new husband walked in to the room and asked what was wrong, I told him that I realized I am not going to be Mary Tyler Moore, He laughed. Some men may have taken offense, but he “got” it. I wasn’t regretting the marriage; I was saying goodbye to one part of a childhood dream.