2009 started off for me, right where 2008 left off. My father passed away in December of 2008 and on January 2, 2009 we took my mom to the Emergency room. She passed away 24 days later. It is hard to mention these two losses without mentioning that in December of 2007, my nephew passed away quite unexpectedly. My mantra after my nephew’s passing was “2008 has to be a better year”. My mantra after my father’s passing was “2009 has to be a better year.” After my mom’s passing, I gave up on mantras.
So, you can glean the worst of 2009 for me. Could there be a best after all of that? Yes, out of darkness there is always light. I don’t believe I’ve been one to take my friends and family for granted. However, when you are in the midst of foggy grief, endless trips to the hospital, making life decisions you’d never, ever wish upon anyone, you do truly realize how the connections you make in life are a true life support system for you. I’ve always been cognizant of how wonderful my friends and family are, but during that time, all their lights shined on for miles. I realized how blessed I truly am. So, personally, I’ve experienced the worst through loss and the best through the lights of all my friends and family.
Now, I need to lighten up the mood and share what I think is the Best and Worst of 2009 in the world around us. I tried to avoid many of the obvious choices, however, some are listed with my own twist!
Best of 2009—(not in any particular order):
The World of Entertainment
• LOST returns for a fantastic season! Thank you Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse. I’d also like to mention that Matthew Fox does not get enough credit for his acting. I know some people think his character is annoying—but I think his acting is on the mark!
• Seinfeld Reunion on “Curb Your Enthusiasm” - TV at its absolute best!!! Kudos to Larry David and the entire cast! If you are Seinfeld fan, it should not be missed! Now I just need Aaron Sorkin to film a semi-autobiographical sitcom so I can stop holding my breath for a “Sports Night” reunion!
• “The Hurt Locker”- I said it before, I’ll say it again—best movie of the year.
• Glee—although sometimes I think it crosses an unnecessary line—it is fresh and new for network TV!
• Bones – continues to entertain. I often drop one hour shows after about season three because they become uninteresting and formulaic. (Desperate Housewives, Grey’s Anatomy…) However, I still cannot get enough of Bones!!! Thanks to the amazing writing and the amazing cast!
• Friday Night Lights is still surviving!! Yipee! Why this show does not receive more nominations is beyond me. The writing and acting are fantastic!
• The Office—Jim and Pam’s Wedding! Woot! Woot!! Great fun!
• Community and Modern Family—great new sitcoms!
• Here’s What…@Bravo Andy hosts a weekly show!! Just wish it was on at 11pm vs. Midnight!! (Okay, so I’m getting older…..)
The World Outside of Entertainment
• Twitter(new to me as a user in ’09) At first, I didn’t get the purpose. Now that I get it, I’m addicted. Best three folks to follow: @HartHanson, @JoshMalina and @JackGrayCNN. Their wit and insight brighten my day.
• Our first African-American President is elected. Politics aside that was a great moment for American history. Even my staunch conservative uncle, who is not an Obama fan (Calling him “not a fan” is cushioning the reality of his dislike for Obama’s politics) sent an email on January 20, 2009 saying what a great day for the history of our country. Now we just need a woman president!! (Of course--only if she is the right person for the job!)
• A gutsy pilot, a plane and the Hudson River. Captain Sullenberger and Flight 1549—an amazing story that captivates us because we all fear flying at least a tad. This story gives us hope.
• Girl, 14, rescued after Yemeni plane crashes in Indian Ocean. This is a story I still cannot believe. A plane crashes into the ocean and everyone dies except one 14 year old girl. How does that happen? Truly a miracle! I hope she is doing well, I’m sure she can’t believe it herself.
• Jacoby Ellsbury Steals Home!!! How cool!!
• Los Angeles Anaheim Angels—Entire starting lineup bats at .300 or above at one point.
• My friend’s brother battles cancer and wins!!!
• My niece battles cancer and wins!!!
• Beyonce’s Grace.
• Connecting with friends on Facebook!
• My daughter takes a passionate interest in something……(See the Worst)
Worst of 2009 (Not in any particular order)
• Her passion? Justin Bieber. Don’t get me wrong, he seems like a very respectable, humble, nice young man. I just wish as much thought and concern went into her math homework as it does for strategically placing hundreds of Bieber pictures on her wall.
• Jay Leno continues his show. I won’t elaborate, previous blogs explain it all. (Ha Ha Time Magazine—I guess he didn’t change the face of television!)
• “Partisanship” within our government and within our press is becoming trite and completely ineffective.
• Balloon Boy’s parents. It is sad that the drive for fame blinded the parents to the consequences of the stunt to their children and potentially to those trying to “save” their son. (P.S. My addiction to Twitter had me right on top of the story. @JackGray(CNN) posted it and I turned the TV to CNN to watch and pray for the boy!)
• Tiger’s fall from grace. I know we are all sick of the story and the family should be able to deal with it in privacy. However, as a student of human behavior, I find it fascinating--famous or not famous. One or two “indiscretions” one could argue that might not be so uncommon. However, 12 to 18 indiscretions in a four year period? Also, many of those “indiscretions” were actually “relationships” not simply one night stands. I find it all fascinating—the double life and the power of money. A truly great case study.
• SwirlGirl is put on cholesterol lowering medicine. My only saving grace is that Anderson Cooper mentioned he was on Lipitor. Oddly, that makes me feels a little bit better.
• Kanye’s lack of common sense and humility.
• As I write this, a new story is explaining how a man stole the St. Jude’s Collection Money from a convenient store. That is pretty low.
• This year we lost many notable people: Ted Kennedy, Michael Jackson, Ed McMahon, Farah Fawcett, Patrick Swayze, John Hughes, Natasha Richardson, Brittany Murphy and so many more.
• Certain Hollywood heavies actually stick up for Roman Polanski. (Please read earlier blogs if you want to hear more of how I feel about Mr. Polanski. Actually, the topic of RP was my first blog.)
• The story of the Salvation Army worker who was killed during an attempted robbery is one of the saddest stories I’ve heard. It is one of the stories that leaves you asking "Why?" It happened Christmas Eve. If you haven’t heard about it, please search "thestar.com". I tried to add the link, but it did not work.
• Oprah calls it quits. Bummer, but I get it. I’ll elaborate in 2011.
I wish everyone a fantastic (dare I say better?) 2010!!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Money, Money, Money
Money is a controversial topic. People think some have too much and most think they do not have enough. I think money issues boil down to personal priorities. I also think people shouldn’t talk about their lack of money or their abundance of money. Money issues are all relative. A family that lives in house that costs $900,000 can be in as much debt or money troubles as a person who lives in a house that costs $100,000. Also, a person who lives in a $100,000 house may be in much better financial shape compared to someone who lives in a $900,000 house. It boils down to how you manage your money. My husband’s grandfather used to say “Just because you spend a lot of money, doesn’t mean you have a lot of money.”--So true.
What frustrates me most about money? People who complain about not having enough, yet they seem to have a lot of stuff. I believe you do not have the right to complain about not being able to afford this or that if you meet 2 of the following criteria:
1.You or your partner has NOT recently lost your job. (e.g. your income remains unchanged)
2.You own a Coach purse.
3.You go for manicures and/or pedicures more than twice per year.
4.Your child wears a pair of UGGs or Emus or any brand of boot that cost more than $80.
5.You have more than 1 computer in your house.
6.There are more than 2 iPods in your household.
7.You have a gaming system in your house.
8.You contribute to a college savings account.
9.You own a house with a 3 car garage or you own a 2nd home.
I actually think I’m being generous. I almost put, “if you own a house.” So, I’ve turned half of you off now, right? Well, read carefully. I’m not judging you if you meet all of these criteria. I meet 6 out of the 9 criteria. I don’t care what you spend your money on; I also don’t care if you spend beyond your means. What I care about is you being out of touch with society and complaining about not being able to afford a night out to dinner or a weekend away! It is all a matter of how you prioritize your spending. You can afford to eat out and go on a vacation—you just need to prioritize differently. Personally, second to the essential needs of life, vacation is my next priority. I’d live without furniture, new shoes, and yes even my iPod, to go on a vacation. (Truthfully, I’d live without my kids’ college savings fund—but that just wouldn’t be nice. Would it? Anyone?)
Now, many different types of people can meet 2 out the 9 above. I’m willing to bet I can find people who meet 2 out of the 9 above who live below the poverty line and of course, those who live well above the poverty line. This is what I mean by “it is all relative and comes down to how you spend your money.” What do you give top priority?
(Okay, no jokesters. I get it if you say you can’t afford a $10,000 African Safari or $50,000/year college tuition. Although, also relative, I might not get it if Paris Hilton says that while parading around in her $10,000 outfit!)
Some people have difficult choices to make every day. Choices likes “Can I afford the extra money to buy ingredients to make a birthday cake for my daughter? Or “Can I afford the $10 for my son to go on his school field trip? Those are the tough choices, not whether I can get a pedicure this week. I just think we get caught up in our own economic realities and forget what our problems might seem like to others.
I’m also not saying you should feel guilty about how you spend your money. You’ve worked hard for your money; you have the choice to spend it on whatever you want. Remember when you were a kid and you didn’t want to finish your meal? Your mom would say “There are people in Africa starving and you won’t eat.” “Well, I’m’ sorry mom. If I could Fedex this food to them I would, but I am full!” We do not need to feel guilty about what we have. (Whether we live in a society of excess is a different blog! Although, I will give you a clue as to how I feel. We do. And I am shamefully guilty of partaking in the excesses.) However, I do think if you can meet 2-3 of the above criteria—you should be socially conscious and donate some money to a worthy cause of your choice or at least pick at tag or two from a Giving Tree during the holidays.
I know, I sound judgmental. For those who know me, you know I hate to be judgmental. So I want to clarify my point—I don’t care if you get a pedicure twice a week—just don’t complain about not being able to buy your kids a school sweatshirt if you are getting pedicures twice a week!!! Do you get the point?
I think my feelings stem from growing up with my Dad. He would never say he couldn’t afford something. He grew up very poor. Breakfast for him consisted of coffee with crackers and lunch was mayonnaise between two pieces of bread. So, he worked hard to afford things for his family that he didn’t have as a child. So, as a matter of pride, I don’t think he uttered those words until the latter part of his life. (Even if he couldn’t afford something, he wouldn’t verbalize it)
Also, for those who know me, you know I am horrible at prioritizing my spending. The difference is, I will not complain about not having the money to do something. I may say I don’t think doing X is worth X amount of money. I’ll complain about the “value” of something or I might say, “I’m not willing to pay that.” Affording something is complex and personal. Some people consider they can “afford” it if they still have room on their credit card and others simple consider what they can “afford” by the amount of money in their bank account.
I guess it also comes down to honesty. I think some people use the words “I can’t afford it” as an excuse so they do not have to tell their friends, “I really don’t want to do that.” I guess if you fall into that boat, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m always for honesty, it is not always easy. I’d just come up with a better excuse.
Bottom line, be thankful for what you have and if you want something, think about how you can manage your money to get it!
What frustrates me most about money? People who complain about not having enough, yet they seem to have a lot of stuff. I believe you do not have the right to complain about not being able to afford this or that if you meet 2 of the following criteria:
1.You or your partner has NOT recently lost your job. (e.g. your income remains unchanged)
2.You own a Coach purse.
3.You go for manicures and/or pedicures more than twice per year.
4.Your child wears a pair of UGGs or Emus or any brand of boot that cost more than $80.
5.You have more than 1 computer in your house.
6.There are more than 2 iPods in your household.
7.You have a gaming system in your house.
8.You contribute to a college savings account.
9.You own a house with a 3 car garage or you own a 2nd home.
I actually think I’m being generous. I almost put, “if you own a house.” So, I’ve turned half of you off now, right? Well, read carefully. I’m not judging you if you meet all of these criteria. I meet 6 out of the 9 criteria. I don’t care what you spend your money on; I also don’t care if you spend beyond your means. What I care about is you being out of touch with society and complaining about not being able to afford a night out to dinner or a weekend away! It is all a matter of how you prioritize your spending. You can afford to eat out and go on a vacation—you just need to prioritize differently. Personally, second to the essential needs of life, vacation is my next priority. I’d live without furniture, new shoes, and yes even my iPod, to go on a vacation. (Truthfully, I’d live without my kids’ college savings fund—but that just wouldn’t be nice. Would it? Anyone?)
Now, many different types of people can meet 2 out the 9 above. I’m willing to bet I can find people who meet 2 out of the 9 above who live below the poverty line and of course, those who live well above the poverty line. This is what I mean by “it is all relative and comes down to how you spend your money.” What do you give top priority?
(Okay, no jokesters. I get it if you say you can’t afford a $10,000 African Safari or $50,000/year college tuition. Although, also relative, I might not get it if Paris Hilton says that while parading around in her $10,000 outfit!)
Some people have difficult choices to make every day. Choices likes “Can I afford the extra money to buy ingredients to make a birthday cake for my daughter? Or “Can I afford the $10 for my son to go on his school field trip? Those are the tough choices, not whether I can get a pedicure this week. I just think we get caught up in our own economic realities and forget what our problems might seem like to others.
I’m also not saying you should feel guilty about how you spend your money. You’ve worked hard for your money; you have the choice to spend it on whatever you want. Remember when you were a kid and you didn’t want to finish your meal? Your mom would say “There are people in Africa starving and you won’t eat.” “Well, I’m’ sorry mom. If I could Fedex this food to them I would, but I am full!” We do not need to feel guilty about what we have. (Whether we live in a society of excess is a different blog! Although, I will give you a clue as to how I feel. We do. And I am shamefully guilty of partaking in the excesses.) However, I do think if you can meet 2-3 of the above criteria—you should be socially conscious and donate some money to a worthy cause of your choice or at least pick at tag or two from a Giving Tree during the holidays.
I know, I sound judgmental. For those who know me, you know I hate to be judgmental. So I want to clarify my point—I don’t care if you get a pedicure twice a week—just don’t complain about not being able to buy your kids a school sweatshirt if you are getting pedicures twice a week!!! Do you get the point?
I think my feelings stem from growing up with my Dad. He would never say he couldn’t afford something. He grew up very poor. Breakfast for him consisted of coffee with crackers and lunch was mayonnaise between two pieces of bread. So, he worked hard to afford things for his family that he didn’t have as a child. So, as a matter of pride, I don’t think he uttered those words until the latter part of his life. (Even if he couldn’t afford something, he wouldn’t verbalize it)
Also, for those who know me, you know I am horrible at prioritizing my spending. The difference is, I will not complain about not having the money to do something. I may say I don’t think doing X is worth X amount of money. I’ll complain about the “value” of something or I might say, “I’m not willing to pay that.” Affording something is complex and personal. Some people consider they can “afford” it if they still have room on their credit card and others simple consider what they can “afford” by the amount of money in their bank account.
I guess it also comes down to honesty. I think some people use the words “I can’t afford it” as an excuse so they do not have to tell their friends, “I really don’t want to do that.” I guess if you fall into that boat, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m always for honesty, it is not always easy. I’d just come up with a better excuse.
Bottom line, be thankful for what you have and if you want something, think about how you can manage your money to get it!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
November Thoughts
Women Attacked by Chimp Sues CT for $150,000
I think this chimp attack was horrific. I do not know the chimp owner—but based on some stories that appeared in the press, I don’t think it is a stretch to say she had an unusual love for her chimp. I also do not know the woman attacked, however, from what I’ve read she was the woman’s friend and she often visited the woman and her chimp. In my opinion, if you frequently visited the chimp, it is questionable as to how fair is to now say the state should’ve taken action sooner.
Do I think the state should’ve taken action sooner? Probably. If they were aware of the chimp and the chimp’s escapades, action might have been a good idea. Let’s face it; you don’t usually see chimps driving cars. Alone. By themselves. Without a human in the car. With a human in the car, perhaps, but without, never.
I think this lawsuit now stands in a long line of lawsuits in our country that answers the question “Do you think we have a case?” vs. “Does it make sense and is this right thing to do?” I wonder what the victim’s opinion of her friend’s pet was prior to the accident. If she did visit the friend often, I’m led to believe she liked the chimp and supported her friend.
I know the victim’s life, and her family’s life, has been changed forever. I want you know, I feel for her and wish her the best. I just don’t think suing the state for $150,000,000 is the right answer. I understand that lawsuits like this one potentially serve a valiant purpose. “…if we sue the state now, hopefully this will not happen to another person.” I get that, but start with a lower number. This number just makes the suit seem ridiculous. It does get attention and perhaps that is the point However, aren’t we all becoming desensitized to sensationalism?
Obama and Fox News
Stop crying Mr. President and Mr. President’s staff. I don’t like Fox News either, but thank God, our Forefathers, Veterans, Soldiers and every American that came before us, that we live in a country with FREEDOM of SPEECH! Don’t get all dictatorship on us! George Bush didn’t wine about MSNBC ‘s Olberman , Maddow and others. We having an expression in our family when we think someone is becoming too sensitive about a topic…we simply say “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. To the current administration, I say “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.”
News In General
Okay, as I said in “Obama and Fox News”, I don’t care for Fox News. I should specifically say I don’t care for certain commentators (their not newscasters, remember) like Sean Hannity and Glen Beck. In fairness, I also do not care for MSNBC’s Keith Olberman and Rachel Maddow. They are all extremely “closed-minded”. Yes, even liberals can be closed-minded. When all you see is what you want to see—you have closed your mind. These people “act” as if we live in a black and white world—well we don’t. I wish people would get over that. We live in a world of gray. There are always, at least, two sides to every story. This type of media divides our country. They “rally” their troops with their sensationalized thoughts and ideas. Rush Limbaugh is the worst. In fact, he is in a category all to himself. He presents his thoughts and ideas with rancid venom. I wish as a nation, as humans, we could just try to look at every issue from multiple perspectives and then come to our OWN conclusions.
So, I don’t watch either of the networks mentioned. If I want “news” I rely on CNN for news (not commentary), my local stations, the internet and yes, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.
Parenting in the Age of the Internet
Okay parents, time to get a grip. (My kids absolutely hate when I say “get a grip”) Our children are growing up within a different time and culture. Is it good or bad? It really doesn’t matter because IT IS. We need to adapt. We also need to pay attention to every teachable moment. As parents, we still influence behavior. Are you on FaceBook? If not, you should be. Join it because it is fun and you will learn a great deal about the generation creeping up behind us. I am friends with my kids on FaceBook. It was a condition for them to open their accounts. I have not asked one of their friends to be my friend. Many of my friends did ask my children to be their friends. I told my kids, they only needed to accept my friendship request; they do not have to accept my friends. (They did, but I will say, a little hesitantly).
Since I am friends with them, I can often see pictures from other friends. (I don’t know if everyone realizes this, but if one of my friends is tagged in a photo, I receive notification.) So, I’ve witnessed cruel and crass comments made by other middle/high schoolers on some photos. I use those instances as “teachable moments”. I start a discussion with my kids and explain why I think the comments are inappropriate. They roll their eyes and say “But Mom, we didn’t make the comments.” I explain that we are having the discussion in hopes they that never do make such comments. I heard one parent describing her displeasure regarding the discipline her daughter received at school with respect to something she posted on Facebook. Perhaps the punishment was too harsh, I don’t know. However, never did I hear the Mom say “I know my daughter shouldn’t have posted it, and we discussed why it was wrong.” Hopefully, this did happen. I live by a philosophy at home and work, when something negative happens, one of the first questions you should ask yourself is “How did I contribute to this situation?” As parents, as wonderful as we think our children are—we need to ask “How did they contribute to this situation.” We need to teach accountability. I see parents often excusing their kid’s behavior. You have to call your kids on behavior you don’t like. You have to model the behavior you want.
Okay, I’m going to stop here, because I’m feeling too preachy. I’m not trying to preach and God knows, I’m not an expert at parenting. I don’t think that expertise exists. All we can do is our best attempt at raising responsible, accountable and respectful adults. (Now that is a job that deserves a bonus!)
Oh wait…I want to share a few things I’ve learned about the generation creeping up behind us. (This is not all from being friends with my kids, but I am friends with other family members of a young age too)
• They are not afraid to post swears on line for all to see. Don’t get me wrong, I swore in high school too (in fact, I still do sometimes) I just knew when and where to swear. I didn’t swear in front of adults, teachers, children, in public at the grocery store for all to hear….which is essentially the same thing as posting it on FaceBook.
• Girls are very insecure. When their friends post pictures they have to profess how gorgeous the girl is over and over and over again. I’ve actually seen “I wish I was as pretty as you.” Gag me with a spoon!!! (Okay, yes, I am that old). One thread of multiple girls praising the beauty of another girl really made me sad. Reasons it made me sad: One, that they valued looks so much; two that they seemed not to value their own looks; and three, that the praise for this girl almost seemed to come from a “needy” state. They “needed” to praise her to feel good or to be accepted.
• Young kids post way too much about their love lives. They profess their love, their fears, their needs, etc. Keep this between you, your boyfriend and your CLOSE friends, not the entire world on FB! (Don’t get me wrong, I like reading it—but really, some things should not be for public consumption)
• Kids are unintentionally hurtful. (Yes, some are intentionally hurtful but that is another story). For a generation growing up with wonderful technology, they don’t seem to get it. I’ve seen someone mention by name a girl that they apparently didn’t think to be pretty. (solely based on the comment made, which I will not repeat) The person who named this girl most likely was not FB friends with the girl. However, like I said, I had access to these posts because my niece was in one of the pictures. I was able to view the pictures and all the comments. I’m sure the girl that was named, who was in their grade eventually had the same access through one of her friends. (Another great teachable moment)
Okay, now I’m really done!
I think this chimp attack was horrific. I do not know the chimp owner—but based on some stories that appeared in the press, I don’t think it is a stretch to say she had an unusual love for her chimp. I also do not know the woman attacked, however, from what I’ve read she was the woman’s friend and she often visited the woman and her chimp. In my opinion, if you frequently visited the chimp, it is questionable as to how fair is to now say the state should’ve taken action sooner.
Do I think the state should’ve taken action sooner? Probably. If they were aware of the chimp and the chimp’s escapades, action might have been a good idea. Let’s face it; you don’t usually see chimps driving cars. Alone. By themselves. Without a human in the car. With a human in the car, perhaps, but without, never.
I think this lawsuit now stands in a long line of lawsuits in our country that answers the question “Do you think we have a case?” vs. “Does it make sense and is this right thing to do?” I wonder what the victim’s opinion of her friend’s pet was prior to the accident. If she did visit the friend often, I’m led to believe she liked the chimp and supported her friend.
I know the victim’s life, and her family’s life, has been changed forever. I want you know, I feel for her and wish her the best. I just don’t think suing the state for $150,000,000 is the right answer. I understand that lawsuits like this one potentially serve a valiant purpose. “…if we sue the state now, hopefully this will not happen to another person.” I get that, but start with a lower number. This number just makes the suit seem ridiculous. It does get attention and perhaps that is the point However, aren’t we all becoming desensitized to sensationalism?
Obama and Fox News
Stop crying Mr. President and Mr. President’s staff. I don’t like Fox News either, but thank God, our Forefathers, Veterans, Soldiers and every American that came before us, that we live in a country with FREEDOM of SPEECH! Don’t get all dictatorship on us! George Bush didn’t wine about MSNBC ‘s Olberman , Maddow and others. We having an expression in our family when we think someone is becoming too sensitive about a topic…we simply say “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. To the current administration, I say “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.”
News In General
Okay, as I said in “Obama and Fox News”, I don’t care for Fox News. I should specifically say I don’t care for certain commentators (their not newscasters, remember) like Sean Hannity and Glen Beck. In fairness, I also do not care for MSNBC’s Keith Olberman and Rachel Maddow. They are all extremely “closed-minded”. Yes, even liberals can be closed-minded. When all you see is what you want to see—you have closed your mind. These people “act” as if we live in a black and white world—well we don’t. I wish people would get over that. We live in a world of gray. There are always, at least, two sides to every story. This type of media divides our country. They “rally” their troops with their sensationalized thoughts and ideas. Rush Limbaugh is the worst. In fact, he is in a category all to himself. He presents his thoughts and ideas with rancid venom. I wish as a nation, as humans, we could just try to look at every issue from multiple perspectives and then come to our OWN conclusions.
So, I don’t watch either of the networks mentioned. If I want “news” I rely on CNN for news (not commentary), my local stations, the internet and yes, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.
Parenting in the Age of the Internet
Okay parents, time to get a grip. (My kids absolutely hate when I say “get a grip”) Our children are growing up within a different time and culture. Is it good or bad? It really doesn’t matter because IT IS. We need to adapt. We also need to pay attention to every teachable moment. As parents, we still influence behavior. Are you on FaceBook? If not, you should be. Join it because it is fun and you will learn a great deal about the generation creeping up behind us. I am friends with my kids on FaceBook. It was a condition for them to open their accounts. I have not asked one of their friends to be my friend. Many of my friends did ask my children to be their friends. I told my kids, they only needed to accept my friendship request; they do not have to accept my friends. (They did, but I will say, a little hesitantly).
Since I am friends with them, I can often see pictures from other friends. (I don’t know if everyone realizes this, but if one of my friends is tagged in a photo, I receive notification.) So, I’ve witnessed cruel and crass comments made by other middle/high schoolers on some photos. I use those instances as “teachable moments”. I start a discussion with my kids and explain why I think the comments are inappropriate. They roll their eyes and say “But Mom, we didn’t make the comments.” I explain that we are having the discussion in hopes they that never do make such comments. I heard one parent describing her displeasure regarding the discipline her daughter received at school with respect to something she posted on Facebook. Perhaps the punishment was too harsh, I don’t know. However, never did I hear the Mom say “I know my daughter shouldn’t have posted it, and we discussed why it was wrong.” Hopefully, this did happen. I live by a philosophy at home and work, when something negative happens, one of the first questions you should ask yourself is “How did I contribute to this situation?” As parents, as wonderful as we think our children are—we need to ask “How did they contribute to this situation.” We need to teach accountability. I see parents often excusing their kid’s behavior. You have to call your kids on behavior you don’t like. You have to model the behavior you want.
Okay, I’m going to stop here, because I’m feeling too preachy. I’m not trying to preach and God knows, I’m not an expert at parenting. I don’t think that expertise exists. All we can do is our best attempt at raising responsible, accountable and respectful adults. (Now that is a job that deserves a bonus!)
Oh wait…I want to share a few things I’ve learned about the generation creeping up behind us. (This is not all from being friends with my kids, but I am friends with other family members of a young age too)
• They are not afraid to post swears on line for all to see. Don’t get me wrong, I swore in high school too (in fact, I still do sometimes) I just knew when and where to swear. I didn’t swear in front of adults, teachers, children, in public at the grocery store for all to hear….which is essentially the same thing as posting it on FaceBook.
• Girls are very insecure. When their friends post pictures they have to profess how gorgeous the girl is over and over and over again. I’ve actually seen “I wish I was as pretty as you.” Gag me with a spoon!!! (Okay, yes, I am that old). One thread of multiple girls praising the beauty of another girl really made me sad. Reasons it made me sad: One, that they valued looks so much; two that they seemed not to value their own looks; and three, that the praise for this girl almost seemed to come from a “needy” state. They “needed” to praise her to feel good or to be accepted.
• Young kids post way too much about their love lives. They profess their love, their fears, their needs, etc. Keep this between you, your boyfriend and your CLOSE friends, not the entire world on FB! (Don’t get me wrong, I like reading it—but really, some things should not be for public consumption)
• Kids are unintentionally hurtful. (Yes, some are intentionally hurtful but that is another story). For a generation growing up with wonderful technology, they don’t seem to get it. I’ve seen someone mention by name a girl that they apparently didn’t think to be pretty. (solely based on the comment made, which I will not repeat) The person who named this girl most likely was not FB friends with the girl. However, like I said, I had access to these posts because my niece was in one of the pictures. I was able to view the pictures and all the comments. I’m sure the girl that was named, who was in their grade eventually had the same access through one of her friends. (Another great teachable moment)
Okay, now I’m really done!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Local Politics
Tee Hee! LOL! I heard the funniest thing today. SW Republicans list as one of their accomplishments increased standardized testing scores! Are you kidding me? Sorry, politcians, you had nothing to do with it. Despite your best efforts in cutting teachers and education programs, the teachers, administration and STUDENTS succeeded. NOT YOU! I feel I have the right to pin the teacher and program cuts on you since you listed those two items as accompishments in your newsletter too. I'm neither a Republican or a Democrat (and I'll tell you, living in this town will drive anyone away from a major party!) I'm just an "interested" party who thinks the politics in this town is out of control. I've been asked to run for positions by both parties and I will never do it. I might run as independent one day or a part of the new party organized in town. I am glad to see some fresh faces up for election this year. Since I'm an equal opportunity critic, I also LOL when I read that some Democrat candidates list their years of service in office as a "plus". Sorry, not a plus to me. We need to shake this town up!!! This is not meant to be personal against anyone, I like many of these people, HOWEVER, it is time for a change.
Friday, October 9, 2009
What Did Barack Obama Do?
Barack Obama was announced today as the Nobel Peace Prize recipient. My reaction was, "Huh?"
Before I begin this rant, let me state that I am neither an Obama Hater, nor an Obama Lover. I am an Obama supporter. I voted for Obama. I still believe that I voted for the best choice available to me. I think we as a society need to strive to keep an open mind. I am frightened by the hatred many people feel toward Obama, however, I am equally frightened by those who seem to "idolize" him. I think both are dangerous because the haters will never see any good and those who idolize him will never see any bad. Obama has the hardest job in this country, some might argue the world. He will do some right and he will do some wrong. We should ALL be rooting for him to do more right....it impacts all of our lives. (All of the above is why I am neither a Repbulican nor a Democrat. I am proud to be unaffiliated. I think the two party system is ruining and dividing our country. A rant will save for later...)
Now, back to the Nobel Peace Prize. I'm not clear on what Obama did to win this honor. I believe his goal is to work towards Peace, but not sure has made an inch of progress so far. So, I researched the Nobel Peace Prize. According to the AP, it is a myth that someone needs to have made progress in peace efforts to win the prize. The AP stated, "...more often, the prize is awarded to encourage those who receive it to see the effort through, sometimes at critical moments." So, yes, Obama fits that criterion, particularly the "critical moments" piece. However, I suspect other World Leaders fit this criterion too. Granted, people often call the President of the United States the "most powerful position in the world," so that beefs up Obama's realm of influence on Peace. I would argue we shouldn't think of POTUS as the most powerful position in the world. (We'll save that for a rant to be named later.)
I continued my research. I read the names of the past recipients and why they won. Well, I think the AP statement of "more often" was overstated. Most of the recipients demonstrated specific actions and work that worked towards Peace or brought awareness to global issues that impact Peace. So, I am back to thinking, "Why Obama?" The Norwegian Nobel Committee state he was awarded this honor for "his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.:" Could they share a list of his "extraordinary efforts." during his Presidency or even since he was catapulted onto the radar screen of the world? I don't believe a few great speeches and an inspiring book count as "extraordinary efforts." I believe he has the potential to make extraordinary efforts on this front, I just think this award might be a few years too early. The nomination deadline for this prize is February 1st. Just adds more mystery to the "Why?"
You might ask yourself, "SwirlGirl, why do you care?" I care because everyday there are people on this planet working toward Peace. As I reveiwed the list of names of Nobel Peace Prize recipients, I certainly saw names that I recognized (Carter, Anan, Tutu, Kissinger, Sadat, Gorbachev, King, etc.) I also saw names I didn't recognize (Aung San Suu Kyi, Joseph Rotblat, Betty Williams, Mairead Corrigan, etc.). I care because I hope someone unknown wasn't overlooked for their truly extraoridnary effort for someone who has the potential to perform extraordinary effort.
POST RANT NOTE: Currently watching Obama's press conference on topic. He handled it well...stated he feels he doesn't belong in the company of previous recipients and sees this as a call to action to build momentum.
ANOTHER POST RANT NOTE: Someone objectively stated on a news show "this feels like a we're glad you are not George Bush award"---it does feel a bit like that. Which isn't right either.
Before I begin this rant, let me state that I am neither an Obama Hater, nor an Obama Lover. I am an Obama supporter. I voted for Obama. I still believe that I voted for the best choice available to me. I think we as a society need to strive to keep an open mind. I am frightened by the hatred many people feel toward Obama, however, I am equally frightened by those who seem to "idolize" him. I think both are dangerous because the haters will never see any good and those who idolize him will never see any bad. Obama has the hardest job in this country, some might argue the world. He will do some right and he will do some wrong. We should ALL be rooting for him to do more right....it impacts all of our lives. (All of the above is why I am neither a Repbulican nor a Democrat. I am proud to be unaffiliated. I think the two party system is ruining and dividing our country. A rant will save for later...)
Now, back to the Nobel Peace Prize. I'm not clear on what Obama did to win this honor. I believe his goal is to work towards Peace, but not sure has made an inch of progress so far. So, I researched the Nobel Peace Prize. According to the AP, it is a myth that someone needs to have made progress in peace efforts to win the prize. The AP stated, "...more often, the prize is awarded to encourage those who receive it to see the effort through, sometimes at critical moments." So, yes, Obama fits that criterion, particularly the "critical moments" piece. However, I suspect other World Leaders fit this criterion too. Granted, people often call the President of the United States the "most powerful position in the world," so that beefs up Obama's realm of influence on Peace. I would argue we shouldn't think of POTUS as the most powerful position in the world. (We'll save that for a rant to be named later.)
I continued my research. I read the names of the past recipients and why they won. Well, I think the AP statement of "more often" was overstated. Most of the recipients demonstrated specific actions and work that worked towards Peace or brought awareness to global issues that impact Peace. So, I am back to thinking, "Why Obama?" The Norwegian Nobel Committee state he was awarded this honor for "his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.:" Could they share a list of his "extraordinary efforts." during his Presidency or even since he was catapulted onto the radar screen of the world? I don't believe a few great speeches and an inspiring book count as "extraordinary efforts." I believe he has the potential to make extraordinary efforts on this front, I just think this award might be a few years too early. The nomination deadline for this prize is February 1st. Just adds more mystery to the "Why?"
You might ask yourself, "SwirlGirl, why do you care?" I care because everyday there are people on this planet working toward Peace. As I reveiwed the list of names of Nobel Peace Prize recipients, I certainly saw names that I recognized (Carter, Anan, Tutu, Kissinger, Sadat, Gorbachev, King, etc.) I also saw names I didn't recognize (Aung San Suu Kyi, Joseph Rotblat, Betty Williams, Mairead Corrigan, etc.). I care because I hope someone unknown wasn't overlooked for their truly extraoridnary effort for someone who has the potential to perform extraordinary effort.
POST RANT NOTE: Currently watching Obama's press conference on topic. He handled it well...stated he feels he doesn't belong in the company of previous recipients and sees this as a call to action to build momentum.
ANOTHER POST RANT NOTE: Someone objectively stated on a news show "this feels like a we're glad you are not George Bush award"---it does feel a bit like that. Which isn't right either.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Dave, Dave, Dave
I know everyone has been waiting for me to comment on Dave Letterman's recent "legal" issues. (Tee Hee, like how I pretend I actually have many followers waiting in anticipation for each and every post?)
Before I begin--these are my true ramblings of random thoughts and disconnected rants! So I apologize now if you find it hard to follow!
Some of you may know that Letterman is one of my favorites. He is one of 3 people I choose when people ask "Which famous person would you invite to dinner?" Before I address his recent headlines....let me explain to you why I like Dave so much (which includes an explanation of why I am NOT a Jay fan)
Okay, I've watched Letterman since he had a morning show back in the early 80's. (Prior to him getting the post Tonight Show gig) He is funny. I think many people do not get his humor. Aside from being funny, he has a talent that many talk show hosts lack (JAY), he is extremely adept at interviewing people. He actually listens to people and reacts to them. Yes, there are times when an interview goes off kilter--but usually because the guest is off-kilter (Crispin Glover, Joaquin Phoenix). Surprisingly, his best interviews are with non-Hollywood celeb types. His interviews with Brokaw, Rumsfeld, Clinton, etc. are not to be missed. He really gets to the heart of important issues. Dave truly changed after his heart surgery, I liked him prior to that but liked him 10x more after that. He is a rich celeb who is still in touch with the real world.
Okay, what is my beef with Jay? We all know that Jay was chosen over Dave for the Tonight's Show spot. Lets be clear, this was not Johnny's choice. (Johnny Carson--one of my all time favorites!) I don't really understand how Johnny didn't have final say--but the network wanted Jay. (Similar to how "supposedly" the network wanted Jay to leave his Tonight Show so Conan could attract younger viewers??? I don't buy that one--why would you want the guy who is #1 to leave--doesn't make any sense) Jay may be a funny stand up--but he is HORRIBLE at interviewing people. All questions always come back Jay. Jay, it is not about you, it is about your guest. He may be the hardest working man in show business but I think that is a major flaw for his profession. Too much work, not enough life. Okay, so I used to watch Jay when he had a good guest on (and a show based in CA typically has more access to bigger names). However, I do not watch Jay anymore. When he pontificated 3 years ago about how he was going to be the bigger person and announce his successor so that there was no mystery and no hard feelings like when he was announced and their were hurt feelings (referring to Dave), I had enough. Does he need to bring that up? First, totally different situation. Jay, you never took a day off or vacation so there were no opportunities for guest hosts, etc. Conan was the obvious choice. He consistently seized opportunities to make himself look like the good guy when he was awarded the job as Tonight Show host. I smell a rat when people feel the need to make themselves look good.
The last straw: Jay doesn't want to leave TV. Big surprise. So, he threatens to leave the network and compete in a time slot against Conan. Network says, lets put Jay in prime time. So, all that pontificating about being the bigger person goes down the drain in my opinion. Although they are on the same network, he is competing against Conan! His show is exactly the same format and it is on earlier--people do not have to stay up late. That is so wrong on so many levels. I can't believe Newsweek (or Time) had him on the cover claiming "Jay is changing network television". He changed his time slot folks, that is it.
I know I've digressed, but let me leave you with this thought on the subject: During Johnny Carson's retirement he would call Dave and provide him with jokes for his monologue--he never did this for Jay.
Now to Dave.....
I'm going to have chunk out my opinions on his latest "legal" situation:
Before I begin--these are my true ramblings of random thoughts and disconnected rants! So I apologize now if you find it hard to follow!
Some of you may know that Letterman is one of my favorites. He is one of 3 people I choose when people ask "Which famous person would you invite to dinner?" Before I address his recent headlines....let me explain to you why I like Dave so much (which includes an explanation of why I am NOT a Jay fan)
Okay, I've watched Letterman since he had a morning show back in the early 80's. (Prior to him getting the post Tonight Show gig) He is funny. I think many people do not get his humor. Aside from being funny, he has a talent that many talk show hosts lack (JAY), he is extremely adept at interviewing people. He actually listens to people and reacts to them. Yes, there are times when an interview goes off kilter--but usually because the guest is off-kilter (Crispin Glover, Joaquin Phoenix). Surprisingly, his best interviews are with non-Hollywood celeb types. His interviews with Brokaw, Rumsfeld, Clinton, etc. are not to be missed. He really gets to the heart of important issues. Dave truly changed after his heart surgery, I liked him prior to that but liked him 10x more after that. He is a rich celeb who is still in touch with the real world.
Okay, what is my beef with Jay? We all know that Jay was chosen over Dave for the Tonight's Show spot. Lets be clear, this was not Johnny's choice. (Johnny Carson--one of my all time favorites!) I don't really understand how Johnny didn't have final say--but the network wanted Jay. (Similar to how "supposedly" the network wanted Jay to leave his Tonight Show so Conan could attract younger viewers??? I don't buy that one--why would you want the guy who is #1 to leave--doesn't make any sense) Jay may be a funny stand up--but he is HORRIBLE at interviewing people. All questions always come back Jay. Jay, it is not about you, it is about your guest. He may be the hardest working man in show business but I think that is a major flaw for his profession. Too much work, not enough life. Okay, so I used to watch Jay when he had a good guest on (and a show based in CA typically has more access to bigger names). However, I do not watch Jay anymore. When he pontificated 3 years ago about how he was going to be the bigger person and announce his successor so that there was no mystery and no hard feelings like when he was announced and their were hurt feelings (referring to Dave), I had enough. Does he need to bring that up? First, totally different situation. Jay, you never took a day off or vacation so there were no opportunities for guest hosts, etc. Conan was the obvious choice. He consistently seized opportunities to make himself look like the good guy when he was awarded the job as Tonight Show host. I smell a rat when people feel the need to make themselves look good.
The last straw: Jay doesn't want to leave TV. Big surprise. So, he threatens to leave the network and compete in a time slot against Conan. Network says, lets put Jay in prime time. So, all that pontificating about being the bigger person goes down the drain in my opinion. Although they are on the same network, he is competing against Conan! His show is exactly the same format and it is on earlier--people do not have to stay up late. That is so wrong on so many levels. I can't believe Newsweek (or Time) had him on the cover claiming "Jay is changing network television". He changed his time slot folks, that is it.
I know I've digressed, but let me leave you with this thought on the subject: During Johnny Carson's retirement he would call Dave and provide him with jokes for his monologue--he never did this for Jay.
Now to Dave.....
I'm going to have chunk out my opinions on his latest "legal" situation:
- Dave, Dave, Dave....does it disappoint? A little. For me it is disappointing b/c it gives all the Dave haters more ammunition. Is it any of my business? No. As far as his indiscretions, that is a moral issue, he did not commit a crime. I try not to judge others based on my values, especially when I do not have any facts. I can choose not to associate with people b/c they may not share my values, etc. but who am I to judge? (If they break a law--that is different, Mr. Polanski)
- I do applaud Dave for getting ahead of the story. What else could he do right? Well, ask John Edwards, Spitzer, etc. b/c no one advised them to get ahead of the story. That is why they lost so much respect. (Well, Spitzer is in a different category--his hypocrisy lost my respect--he led the charge to stop prostitution--while he was using the services of a prostitute????)
- Ironically, when Stephanie Burkitt appeared on the show during the earlier part of this decade, I used to think to myself "she and Dave would make a good couple" They had the same dry wit.
- Facts--we have little facts in this case. I don't think "we" are owed the facts--but since people are making judgements without facts, I'll throw my two cents in. We do not "when" these affairs occurred and Regina and Dave had "breaks" during that 23 year period.
- National Organization of Women - they stated that Dave has created a "toxic" work environment. They say this based purely on the fact that he dated people that worked for him. I think that his harsh. Sometimes, I think NOW needs to settle. Yes, thank goodness they exist, but like any organized group, originally created with a great purpose, they get lost a bit. So many of Dave's staffers have been with him for 10, 20, almost 30 years. Most people do not stay that long in a toxic environment. Where was NOW when he was dating his current wife Regina (a former staffer) or his previous long time girlfriend (also a former staffer)? Is it okay to date a staffer if you eventually marry them? I think the entertainment industry is different than most--the culture is much different than Corporate America. Personally, I don't think you should date employees, but sometimes it happens. It can happen in a way that is not toxic.
- I think it is ironic that Dave is on CBS, whose CEO is married to an employee. (Les Moonves and Julie Chen). I'm sure when they first starting dating--there was not full disclosure to everyone. Lets face it, when people first start to date, they do not want the world to know--especially when you are in the public eye.
- The lawyer for the alleged blackmailer keeps saying that when we go to trial we will prove Dave sexually harassed employees. Dude, I'm no lawyer--but that is totally irrelevant to your case. Whether Dave did or did not sexually harass employees has nothing to do with your guy blackmailing him. Usually, the blackmailer is right about their accusations, doesn't change the fact that THEY BROKE THE LAW!
- Again, not my business, but I am hoping Dave's indiscretions occurred prior to Harry's birth. Otherwise, my opinion of his character might go down a little.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Polanski, Part II
If you have yet to read my post from 9/29, please read that first.
Okay, if I hear one more time how Roman Polanski's sexual interaction was "consensual" or not "rape rape" I'm going to lose it. She WAS DRUGGED!!!! Impossible for it to be a consensual situation when you've altered the mind of the other person. Also, I was a 13 year old girl once, I've raised 13 year old girls--they do not want to have sex with 44 year old men! Seriously. Even if it is Brad Pitt--they may think he is cute--but 98% of 13 year old girls would not want THAT to happen. As for the other 2%---a 44 year old should still not take advantage of a situation with a CHILD!
P.S. I'm boycotting movies by anyone who signs the petition in support of Polanski. So far, I can no longer see Scorsese, Demme and Lynch films. (Woody Allen has been on my boycott list for years!)
Okay, if I hear one more time how Roman Polanski's sexual interaction was "consensual" or not "rape rape" I'm going to lose it. She WAS DRUGGED!!!! Impossible for it to be a consensual situation when you've altered the mind of the other person. Also, I was a 13 year old girl once, I've raised 13 year old girls--they do not want to have sex with 44 year old men! Seriously. Even if it is Brad Pitt--they may think he is cute--but 98% of 13 year old girls would not want THAT to happen. As for the other 2%---a 44 year old should still not take advantage of a situation with a CHILD!
P.S. I'm boycotting movies by anyone who signs the petition in support of Polanski. So far, I can no longer see Scorsese, Demme and Lynch films. (Woody Allen has been on my boycott list for years!)
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Mr. Polanski, What If It Was Your Child.....
I am outraged by the callous ignorance displayed by seemingly respectable and intelligent people in this world. Roman Polanski committed a crime. In my book, the worst crime possible, a crime against a child. He is not presumed innocent, he pleaded guilty and therefore is found guilty. After his conviction (and alleged misconduct from a judge) he ran, like a coward. An entitled coward. Yes, his early life was rough and tragic. However, that is not a get out of jail free card. He drugged a child and forced her to perform sexual acts---in what world do we live in that we can simply excuse this because he is a renowned director who had a tough life?
I'm also incensed by the support he has been given. I remember when he won the Oscar a few years ago. It sickened me to see people I respect stand up and applaud his win. I've never seen the movie, I never will. I will not give him a dime. I've lost respect for any actor who has chosen to work with him. I'm sorry if that seems harsh, but where do we draw the line? If there was one more victim, would that make a difference? If Jaycee Dugard's tormentor Phillip Garrido let her go and did not hold her captive, would he be above justice? NO! Where, and what line is this that we are drawing for Mr. Polanski?
Alex Kelly hid in Europe for eight years after he was accused of rape. No one cried for him when he returned to face his charges after eight years. So, is it Roman's status as a director that makes him diffferent? A crime is crime, regardless of who commits it.
Many supporters argue that the victim has forgiven him and does not want to press charges. Well guess what? Forgiveness is an emotional act, not a legal act. I commend her for her ability to forgive--that is a vital process for a victim to go through to move on with their life. However, forgiveness does not equal punishment for a crime. Every day States press charges even when victims do not want to, this is not out of the norm.
The French Culture Minister stated, "In the same way that there is a generous America that we like, there is also a scary America, and that has just shown its face." Are you kidding me? Seriously? This is not a political issue. Mr. French Culture Minister, I think your views on this are scary. This is not a little mistake to brush away. I know Europeans are culturally less uptight than Americans about sex, BUT we are talking about a child who was DRUGGED and forced into a situation she did not choose! This should not be swept under the rug.
If we sweep this under the rug and buckle under international pressure on this, we are telling all young children out there that this is potentially happening to--that we don't care. We have to punish these crimes so children feel they have a voice.
Mr. Polanski, Mr. French Culture Minister, Ms. Debra Winger, if your child was drugged and forced to have sex, would you feel differently about justice being served?
Follow Up to Blog:
Okay, if I hear one more time how Roman Polanski's sexual interaction was "consensual" or not "rape rape" I'm going to lose it. She WAS DRUGGED!!!! Impossible for it to be a consensual situation when you've altered the mind of the other person. Also, I was a 13 year old girl once, I've raised 13 year old girls--they do not want to have sex with 44 year old men! Seriously. Even if it is Brad Pitt--they may think he is cute--but 98% of 13 year old girls would not want THAT to happen. As for the other 2%---a 44 year old should still not take advantage of a situation with a CHILD!
P.S. I'm boycotting movies by anyone who signs the petition in support of Polanski. So far, I can no longer see Scorsese, Demme and Lynch films. (Woody Allen has been on my boycott list for years!)
I'm also incensed by the support he has been given. I remember when he won the Oscar a few years ago. It sickened me to see people I respect stand up and applaud his win. I've never seen the movie, I never will. I will not give him a dime. I've lost respect for any actor who has chosen to work with him. I'm sorry if that seems harsh, but where do we draw the line? If there was one more victim, would that make a difference? If Jaycee Dugard's tormentor Phillip Garrido let her go and did not hold her captive, would he be above justice? NO! Where, and what line is this that we are drawing for Mr. Polanski?
Alex Kelly hid in Europe for eight years after he was accused of rape. No one cried for him when he returned to face his charges after eight years. So, is it Roman's status as a director that makes him diffferent? A crime is crime, regardless of who commits it.
Many supporters argue that the victim has forgiven him and does not want to press charges. Well guess what? Forgiveness is an emotional act, not a legal act. I commend her for her ability to forgive--that is a vital process for a victim to go through to move on with their life. However, forgiveness does not equal punishment for a crime. Every day States press charges even when victims do not want to, this is not out of the norm.
The French Culture Minister stated, "In the same way that there is a generous America that we like, there is also a scary America, and that has just shown its face." Are you kidding me? Seriously? This is not a political issue. Mr. French Culture Minister, I think your views on this are scary. This is not a little mistake to brush away. I know Europeans are culturally less uptight than Americans about sex, BUT we are talking about a child who was DRUGGED and forced into a situation she did not choose! This should not be swept under the rug.
If we sweep this under the rug and buckle under international pressure on this, we are telling all young children out there that this is potentially happening to--that we don't care. We have to punish these crimes so children feel they have a voice.
Mr. Polanski, Mr. French Culture Minister, Ms. Debra Winger, if your child was drugged and forced to have sex, would you feel differently about justice being served?
Follow Up to Blog:
Okay, if I hear one more time how Roman Polanski's sexual interaction was "consensual" or not "rape rape" I'm going to lose it. She WAS DRUGGED!!!! Impossible for it to be a consensual situation when you've altered the mind of the other person. Also, I was a 13 year old girl once, I've raised 13 year old girls--they do not want to have sex with 44 year old men! Seriously. Even if it is Brad Pitt--they may think he is cute--but 98% of 13 year old girls would not want THAT to happen. As for the other 2%---a 44 year old should still not take advantage of a situation with a CHILD!
P.S. I'm boycotting movies by anyone who signs the petition in support of Polanski. So far, I can no longer see Scorsese, Demme and Lynch films. (Woody Allen has been on my boycott list for years!)
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